The pitch was excellent. The account manager was sharp, engaged, clearly had done research on your business. You felt like a priority. You signed. Six weeks later, you’re corresponding with someone you’ve never met before. The original account manager is “working with new clients.” The new person is perfectly fine, but they’re starting from scratch…
Your agency recommends a media mix. Google Ads, Meta, and a programmatic display network you’ve never heard of. They explain that this combination gives you the best reach across your audience’s journey. The budget splits $2,000 to Google, $1,500 to Meta, and $1,500 to the display network. What they don’t mention: the display network pays…
The retainer is $3,000 a month. You pay it every month. You receive a report every month. But somewhere around month four, you start to wonder what you’re actually getting for it. The report is there, but the work behind it is hard to identify. You ask the agency what they did this month. The…
The proposal comes in lower than you expected. Lower than the other agencies you spoke to. The work is roughly the same scope — maybe even a bit more — and the price is meaningfully better. You ask a few questions. The answers are confident. You sign. Three months in, the scope conversations start. There…
At some point in the agency relationship, you float the idea of bringing some of the work in-house. Maybe you’ve hired someone who could handle it. Maybe you just want to understand it better. The agency responds thoughtfully. They explain the complexity of what they do — the tools, the expertise, the constantly shifting platform…
You decide to leave your agency. Maybe results were disappointing. Maybe you found someone better. Maybe you want to bring the work in-house. You send the notice and ask for everything: the ad accounts, the content files, the analytics access, the campaign data, the login credentials. The agency is polite about it. They say they’ll…
Six months in, you bring up the targets from the original proposal. The ones that got you excited enough to sign. The agency listens patiently, then explains that the market has shifted, the platform algorithm changed, your competitive landscape is more crowded than anticipated, and frankly, those initial projections were always ambitious. The goalposts have…
The report lands in your inbox on the first of the month. Impressions: up. Reach: up. Engagement rate: up. Your account manager walks you through it on a call, upbeat, confident. You hang up feeling like things are moving. Three months later, the phone isn’t ringing any more than it was before. You’ve been looking…
If your agency’s reports only ever tell a good story, that’s not a coincidence — it’s a technique. Cherry Picking is one of the most common tactics in agency reporting, and most clients never see it happening. Here’s how it works, how to spot it, and how to make sure it stops working on you.
Your agency has every incentive to keep you in the dark. This series exists to change that. Defense Against the Dark Arts is a guide to the thirteen techniques marketing agencies use to extract value without returning it — written by someone who’s seen them from the inside.
